Ramblings of a Zealot ~
“I will greatly rejoice in the Lord, my soul shall be joyful in my God; for He hath clothed me with the garments of salvation, He hath covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decketh Himself with ornaments, and as a bride adorneth herself with her jewels.”
The words that reduced me to tears came pouring into my being like a flood to leave me immobilized ….
“You’re damaged goods… Youre so ugly and ordinary, who could ever love you… Sit up straight so your stupid belly don’t look so fat you pig” ….
The dialog that began to play out in my head was overpowering me because of the venomous words of another, which triggered the smoldering volcano of memories that left me
weeping on my floor ….
I began once again to demean myself. So many of us do this. Over and over we devalue ourselves. Over and over we choose to believe lies over truth. But what is truth in these moments of excruciating pain? Sometimes reality is just merely a perception, and so truth is what your mind perceives to be your reality …. and when we think these thoughts are truth, then we come away lacking and inferior. But we cannot walk into our full potential in Christ when we falsely believe who God created us to be falls woefully short ….
As I lay there weeping, I reached out for my comfort: my bible. And it was like fire burning at my fingertips, and as I opened it and it fell open to the book of Joshua, the words lept right into my spirit; “Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.” (Joshua 1:8) He was with me: I wasn’t alone.
How often and easily do we forget our value? How often do we believe lies of the world instead of words from our Creator about us? We set aside the truth that Jesus came, and lived, and died, to prove to us that we are of great value to the God of the heavens. Sometimes even others see our value when we ourselves are blinded by churning emotions. Our loving Creator has given us inherent value. Yet, we call “ugly” what God calls a “workmanship” (Ephesians 2:10), which means each and every one of us are a masterpiece. And then when we operate according to the lies we hear playing out in our minds, we lose the capacity to follow Him.
How we minimize Jesus’ ultimate sacrifice when we insist that more must be done to redeem our messy lives. We make Satan’s job so simple. He plants one tiny lie somewhere along the path, and we take it all the way to our own self-destruction …. These often begin at an age of innocence that we cannot distinguish lies from truth; and so we adopt words as truth.
We all have them, those lies we believe. Then we adopt new ideas we think will cover them. More lies that we convince ourselves are truth and they become the masks that we hide behind. But eventually the facade cracks, and the old lies remain … resurfacing and still distorting our beliefs about everything. Instead of moving forward in curiosity after God, we get stuck on lies about ourselves. It’s time we learn to uncover the lies, to name them, to call them out! Time to stop believing them and replace them with Christ’s truth ….
I finally get it, though. We forget what God says about our identity in Him. We get wrapped up in things around us. Perhaps our families and jobs require so much of us that we can lose ourselves, and turn into people we never thought we’d become. The harsh reality of life exploits and exposes us. So we turn inward and try to protect what little we think remains. We know there is more to life, but we don’t even have the energy to be curious about it. Then one day we wake up lost and don’t know how to get to what or who we were created to be.
You are NOT what you have do. You are NOT what was said or done to you. And you are NOT defined by your past! Your value isn’t decided by abusive acts perpetrated upon you, by your past choices, whether good or bad, or by your roles today: career woman, wife, mom, sister, friend, etc …. Those are merely experiences that you have, traits you exhibit. But they don’t define the core of your being. You aren’t the sum of your mistakes or the messed-up identity you once wore ….
Your identity is simple. It’s clear. It’s beautiful. Your identity is purely who God says you are. Beautiful…. redeemed…. renamed…. engraved on the hands of Christ, where you will never be forgotten.
The things around us can’t define how we stand, when we’re actually seated with God because: “If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God.
Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. For ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God. When Christ, who is our life, shall appear, then shall ye also appear with Him in glory.”
Where we sit determines how we stand. Therefore, stand tall in your seats, sisters. Stand true in honor and dignity and kindness and grace. Wear the truth that was made for you. Toss off the raggedy clothes of mistaken identity and put on the “garments of salvation” and “robe of righteousness” found in (Isaiah 61:10), that are yours in Christ Jesus. Release the lies and embrace the truth today: you are loved, valued, chrished, and validated by the Creator of the world. Jesus Christ is greater than any sorrow, any mistake, any experience that you have ever had or any lie that you have ever heard or believed. It is safe to allow yourself to be vulnerable and expose yourself to the light. There are no masks needed with Christ because Jesus knows you for who you are and He loves You ❤ …..
Sonething to ponder:
What lies are you believing about yourself today? What is the truth of what God says about you as opposed to your truth that you think about yourself? And how do the lies you believe about yourself interfere with your capacity to follow after what God may have for you?
Let us pray:
Father God, I thank You that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Thank You, Lord, that You call me daughter; chosen, beloved, and valued; and that You have my name engraved on the palm of your hands. Lord, lend me Your eyes, that I may see my true identity through the clear lens of Scripture, and not the distorted lens of the world. Give me strength to release the lie that I seem to love, that I can embrace the truths that hurt. Please help me to not be so blinded by my selfish desires that I miss the truths that I need to grow. Deepen my understanding of who I am in You so that I can live and walk closer after the things you have for me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen ….
(Isaiah 49:15-16), “yet will I not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me.”
(Psalm 139:13-19) “For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.
How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee.”
God is with us …..